I do not care about saving the world if I do not know whom I am. I get panicked with my desires, with my thoughts, my wishes. It just does not seem right. I came to neuroscience to be able to understand and predict myself. But it did not work out that way. The brain is too complex and I just got pissed off. I am back to ten years ago when I first clearly asked myself: who I am? why I am behaving such? what do I want in my life. Studying neuroscience was not the solution, at least not sufficient. Sunk into objectiveness, what science is most proud of, I lost the subjectivity of myself, my uniqueness. I forgot the average does not define me. Learning about where the average sits does not suffice knowing myself. I am a collection of myriad of parameters that aught to be fit. There exist infinite configurations out of the parameters. Where would be the best fit in order for me to be joyful. Where the best of me is shown. Where I feel most satisfied with mySelf.